What is it? Who has it? And how the heck do you keep it in these most difficult times.
Today is the day when many of the churches are empty. Lots of folks did their "churchifying" on Christmas Eve or Christmas morning so to attend today just apparently does not seem necessary.
FYI...Churchifying is a made up word by the estranged husband but it certainly has a ring.
Ticket punched, magic words and elements that keep us in good with the big guy...all part of modern day religion but does that have anything to do with Faith?
Is faith about the church or solely about God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit? Is Faith about being part of the "right club" or is it about more than that.
What does having Faith mean?
Does it mean if we are faithful nothing bad will happen to us? Or is that a myth.?
Is it not a fact that those who have "bad" things happen to them are often looked upon as people who are not "doing it right?" People who are not faithful? I mean surely God will not hurt the faithful. Well, there was Job but that was then and this is now...right?
It has been my experience that you can have all the faith in the world and often all that will do is make you appear feeble minded to those who do not believe but see your struggles.
To believe, to have Faith even when life is good or at least not awful, is not easy.
There are many and is much that that tells us over and over that this is a foolish position to take.
To have faith when the world falls down around your ears and lands with a big fat thunk at your feet is really hard.
I have had a most difficult year. Illness, betrayal, financial problems, more illness, more betrayal, loss of a long time dream, death...it has been a rough one. I have lost faith in certain things. I have lost all faith in the Episcopal Diocese Of Central New York. I have lost faith in the Bishop. I have lost faith in many of the clergy.
I have lost faith in relationships and more often than I care to say in myself.
I have lost faith in organized religion.
I have not lost Faith in God. I have not lost Faith in Jesus. I have not lost faith in the Holy Spirit.
I do not know why that is.
I have a bumper sticker that says"Faith is not believing we know... it is knowing that we believe."
I lost much of what I thought that I was, a wife, a soon to be ordained Deacon, a member of a church community. Many mornings are hard to get out of bed.
But I do. I read a bit of scripture, i read something by Merton and when all else fails i repeat to myself the Merton prayer.
My Lord God I have no idea where I am going .
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do i really know myself and the fact that i think i am following your will does not mean i am actually doing so.
But i believe that the desire to please you does indeed please you.
I hope that i have that desire in all that i am doing.
I hope that i will never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore i will trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.
Faith.
It is not about The Episcopal Diocese. It is not about Lutherans, Catholics, Baptists. It is not about any group. It is ultimately about you and your God.
It is about what you do and who you are because you have Faith.
The Light shines in the Darkness and the Darkness does not overcome it.
Amen
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