Some of us are just freaking nuts! I mean really... for the first time in my life I am starting to feel sorry for men who have to deal with...well...us!!
My good friend( a guy) and I both joined match.com at the same time and let me assure you that his experiences are far weirder than mine have been. I mean really..what kind of woman in her 50's sends pictures of herself in her underpants to a man she has not yet met??
We really should know better. I mean I am all for the whole idea of stating what you want and going for it but a little decorum for a 4 time grandmother does not seem to be too much to ask.
Actually,when I think about grandparents on match.com frankly that weirds me out..and I am one of them!
This could be the reason that i have not had any dates yet. I am not just the too picky"he eats his peas one at a time" girl, i am the girl who is not sure we really should even be on it!
See here is the thing...I would truly hate for my granddaughter to find out that I was known as "pretty panties" in some circles. Not that i ever would be because I think functional is always the way to go and that means I will probably not be showing my white cotton fruit of the looms to any guy by text message anytime soon .
There was a time I considered myself liberal and free. Evidently sometime that all kind of went the way of 8 tracks and Nehru Jackets.
I didn't know it until I started doing this.
I thought I could still walk on the "wild side" but Nope, if I have to so in thongs and stilettos, thanks but no thanks! I prefer not to have wedgies or blisters on any part of me.
So what does that say about all my sisters out there who seem to be going full out on the slut train. What happened to "women need men like fish need a bicycle?"
Who the hell are you trying to impress? If you are over 50 and a grandma and you just sent a picture of yourself to a stranger with your boobs out...well frankly i am without speech on that one.
I have a decent rack for someone my age but I am not going to be taking any pics with my cell phone anytime soon.
Besides I have a heck of a time with all that technology and I would have to ask my daughter and i do not feel there are enough bottles of Xanex in the world to get her through that request!
Now do not get me wrong the men have not all been perfect. I have read some really "interesting"things.
For instance:
If you say the word luscious too many times I am going to think you are gay or you received a word of the day calendar and that was today's word.
If you spend two paragraphs on all the things you are not and will not be... then i have to think you are defensive or very set in your ways.
If you tell me that you want an independent woman who loves to cook, entertain, dress sexy for her man, keep a neat house, and be open for spur of the moment romance...you need one of those Stepford Wives.
But my most favorite yet has been a man who i thought was good looking...read hippie type. He truly attracted me very quickly with his looks.
Lets just say one should not judge a book by its cover.
I read his very long profile and was amazed at what this man was looking for.
He wanted a woman who was comfortable being her own person( so far so good) But( uh oh) was willing to give her all to her man. (Ruh Roh) Then he went on with how one would do that..,
You must be willing to live away from the crowds and join him in "his space".
You must be strong. Now I thought for a minute he might mean of strong character but no he meant physically strong and why was that?? Because he wanted you to be able to cook, clean, chop wood, draw water, indulge and enjoy ( well how could we not) tantric sex.
Then he also wanted a woman who" paid her own way" "Paid her own way??"
See... i am thinking if i have cooked, and cleaned, drawn water, chopped wood, engaged in tantric sex....baby I have paid my own way!!!!!
The worst part is that I do believe he was serious and perhaps...just perhaps...that is why this 54 year old, good looking man was single. I could be just going out on a limb here but it is a possibility.
So we are all a little nuts. The boomer generation seriously has never grown up.
We all really think we are still kids. Not a problem our parents had. But we have it. We are on match.com for crying out loud and we show our boobs. God help us all.
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